Mastering Influence
3 Techniques to Succeed at Influencing Others
Getting others to agree to your idea...It's a challenge we all face whether as professionals or parents. It's an important skill and especially powerful and meaningful when applied with integrity.
Here are 3 techniques from the Harvard Program on Negotiation to help improve your influencing skills.
1) Focus on Meeting Needs
rather than Asserting your Views
Consider this story taken
from Getting to Yes, By Roger Fisher and William Ury: Two Men are quarreling in
a library. One wants the window open and the other wants it closed. They bicker
back and forth about how much to leave it open: a crack, halfway, three
quarters of the way. No solution satisfies them.
Enter the librarian. She
asks one why he wants the window open: "To get some fresh air." She
asks the other why he wants it closed. "To avoid the draft." After
thinking a minute, she opens wide a window
in the next room, bringing
in fresh air without a draft.
2) Invent Options for
Mutual Gain
The case over negotiating
a property price. A common issue and a key opportunity. Often we find ourselves
negotiating along a single dimension. Ie: Price. A creative option can often
make the difference between deadlock and agreement.
A true skill is to invent solutions
advantageous to both parties. Expand the pie before dividing it. Skill at
inventing options is one of the most useful assets a negotiator can have. What
other elements of a sale negotiation would be useful to the parties and add
value to the deal beyond price?
3) Separate the People
from the Problem
Negotiators are people
first. We tend to forget that we are not dealing with "opponents" but
with human beings. They have emotions, deeply held values and different
backgrounds and viewpoints; and they are unpredictable. So are you. The human
aspect of negotiation can either be helpful or disastrous. Understanding and
respect can foster a good deal or hostile, frustrated and offence can poison
one. Egos can break a deal. Failing to deal with the other parties in the
negotiation sensitively as human beings prone to human reactions can devastate
a deal. Whatever else you are doing during a negotiation, it's worth asking
yourself, "Am I paying enough attention to the people
problem?".
Negotiation Training
Most people are not natural born negotiators. But negotiation excellence can be yours. It is both an art and a science. Research consistently shows that through negotiation training and practice, skills can increase substantially. We have over 20 years of negotiation successes (and failures!). The techniques that we teach have consistently proven to give the leading edge and optimal outcomes.
What Kind of Negotiator Are You?
Start your negotiation training now by signing up here for a
FREE 4 Week Email Series
Includes Harvard's Quiz - a personalised self assessment on your negotiating style.
Please note - you will not be spammed. No further emails will be sent to you after the 4 instalments of this tips & techniques series.
Click here to return to Continuous Professional Development.